The ToiBocks Blog

Posts Tagged ‘change’

Being the mother of a 3 year old is interesting.  He gives me plenty of funny things to share with my friends.  As I write this he’s interrupting my typing so I can blow bubbles.  The highlight of his day, other than chasing our Chihuahua, which he calls a chewy wa wa.

Up until a few days ago when it was time to take a nap, all I had to say was “it’s time to have a pillow,” and he would close the game he was playing on line, turn off the monitor and look for his “tinkies” (Nick has two blankies, aka “tinkies” one is an actual blanket and the other is a pillow case from my bed) and come willingly to listen once again to Green Eggs and Ham.  This day, however, was not the case and all that was about to change.  He was having fun and did not want to go take a nap.  I decided to capture it on video, it went something like this:

“Come on Nick, it’s time to have a pillow.”

“No pillow, I’m MAD.”

“You’re mad because you have to have a pillow?”

“No pillow, I’m MAD.” (It’s hard for me at this point not to laugh because he’s communicating so well and his little voice goes really high when he says mad).

“OK, Nick, I understand that you’re mad but come on anyway, it’s time to have a pillow.”

“No come on, I’m MAD.”

This went on for about 3.5 minutes, all captured on video, with him throwing his tinkies and even pretending to hit me, with me laughing under my breath the entire time about how this once willing little angel is trying to exert his limited authority.  I suppose I contributed to the break down because we were an hour past naptime and he was on his “second wind” but, I had things to do   Needless to say, with a major pout, he passed out within 10 minutes and slept for an hour.

It’s amazing how powerful it is to admit, “I’m mad.”  I don’t need you to do anything about it, to understand it, or to try and solve my problem… I just need to be mad for a bit.  My friend Wendy said it best the other day, “people who think they should be happy ALL the time are really limiting their lives.”  There are a range of emotions that come with being human and if you don’t experience them… you’re missing out.  So, it’s OK to be stressed, mad, disappointed, concerned, jealous, etc. as long as you don’t let those emotions run your life.  Acknowledge them, work through them and move past them… in good time.

Emotions are healthy.  Unlike hiding a toy, jewelry or cash, emotions are not something you should be embarrassed about with your kids.  You need to be able to explain to them what they’re feeling and how to work through it…

So the end of my conversation with Nick went something like this.  “I understand that you’re mad Nicky and that’s OK, but you still have to have a pillow.” To which he replied, “no pillow… I’m MAD.” Getting nowhere I opted for, “I hear you that you are mad, but guess what, you need to pick up your tinkies and get into that bed right now.”  For effect, I blocked his retreat and kept walking until he was forced up onto the bed.  The video running the entire time, I said “Say good nonny momma.”  Even though his speach was affected by the pacifier and the attitude, he complied.  “Say I love you mommy.”  Even mad, he still said it… and followed up with a big hug.

I suppose I’m luckier than most because even temper tantrums are manageable in my house when you belong to the Church of Common Sense or perhaps it is because I belong that they are manageable…  either way, I’ve got three great little people that I’m grooming to change the world and so far, they’re doing a great job!

From The Secret Daily Teachings…

When things change in our life, often we have resistance to the change. But if you understand the structure of the Universe, life, and creation, then you will understand that life is change, and nothing ever stands still. Everything is energy, and energy is in continual motion and change.  If energy stood still, you would be gone, and there would be no life.

Change is always happening for the good of you and for everyone.  It is the evolution of life.